Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I can count

Climate change leads to spread of infection-causing fungi, scientists say - ABC News

I actually pay taxes

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

Do "flat-earthers" attempt to sail around the world to prove their theory? Would this support their belief in a flat Earth?

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I can read

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

Why do I like to eat my own cum?

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

What makes a woman attractive?

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

‘How to Train Your Dragon’ soars in box office debut with $83.7 million, beating ‘Lilo & Stitch’ - AP News

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I don’t buy bullshit

Should you have a threesome with your best friend and your significant other if the significant other requests it?

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

Insane Clown Posse accidentally headlines Bonnaroo after rain forces festival shutdown - Detroit Metro Times

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

Dune Awakening players call out unfair Landsraad mechanics and ornithopters ‘goomba stomping’ in PvP - Massively Overpowered

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I have complete contempt for fakery

Study Warns: Carbon Dioxide Removal Methods Could Trigger Ocean Oxygen Crisis - Indian Defence Review

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I don’t cotton to rapists

What do you do to make yourself sleep early?

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

Eric Dane Shares Update on His ALS Diagnosis - The Cut

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

A 35-year-old Florida man booked more than 120 free flights by posing as a flight attendant - Fortune

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

Time (physics): Who started counting our current time or is it just "set" by some scientific measure?

I understand how hurricane paths work

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

As a friend of Megan's who also watches Suits, would you advise her not to return to the show in order to protect her character's reputation?

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I see through liars

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I know who the president of Turkey really is

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I have complete contempt for traitorism

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I have a reading level above third grade

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability